Ex’s manipulating Kids

Couldn’t sleep. Big thing is coming up. I should be as perfect prepared as possible. And election issue, feeling the need to find answer, and this scary court processes (why his trial of violence got delayed to December? for what reason? And what’s the impact of his this kind of kids manipulation on it?), misbehaving kid (what kind of father could ruin kids’ mind?), moving, …..feel like having ramyun noodle brain……….. But one good thing is, it was this ex’s canceled trial that I went to and met unexpected chance………….God really works wonder………though nothing is clear yet.

I was hoping that I move on with my life, leave every ugly things behind, and don’t look back. And while I move on, justice serves by itself and I don’t have to worry about it.

But now I am worried. Justice may not be able to serve by itself, and can be screwed up as much as possible by wicked, crooked mind of Ex.

Kids are playing on both sides, but harder on me, because I make them do things they don’t like to do while their father has become sweetest lately and soley focus on entertaining them. When I tell older one to do homework, she calls it as child abuse. Threatens that maybe she should intentionally fail tests and see how i react. Little one warns, if I make her do something she doesn’t like to do, she warns/threatens me that she will tell her father that I hit her. I get chilled. And don’t know what to do.

There seems to be no limit on him to stop all screwing up, lying all the time, and manipulating kids/facts. When he manipulates kids, he is definitely not serving kids but himself.

I want to leave this note as public record. Because I am scared about things / kids being twisted, manipulated by their father and saying things imaginary, untrue, or making up things. I wish I could leave this as e-mail record. But Ex often broke into my e-mail accounts and got rid of my e-mail records if they are disadvantage of him or they are my contact with school people. Because he screwed up with my computer so much (I don’t know how he got into it), I asked someone to re-install everything in computer. But now, as I write this statement, my computer screen gets unruly, cursor jumps up here and there and endless pop up windows pops out here and there. So, I gave up leaving e-mail records expecting that he will erase them anyway.

Sometimes they say scary things to me, making me see that their father is heavily manipulating them whenever he spend time with them on weekend.

Today, when I took kids back from ex, I saw my older daughter’s facial expression looking strange, almost somewhat devilish. I worries a lot about her. Because she imitates a lot of her father’s behavioral problems, including screaming, extreme impatience, never listening, and copying her father’s foul languages, too. During night, I realized that my earlier fear about her was true. Suddenly, she was talking about previous incidence, about seeing some small bruises on her father’s shoulder during the fall of last year. It was first time I have ever heard that kind of thing. And there was no such an incidence at all. She was blaming that her father told her that he and I had argument and I made him fall on wall that caused some bruise on his shoulder. That kind of thing never happened. As time goes by, when he hit me, I didn’t couldn’t resist him, but let him do it. Because resisting had been useless but made things worse, comparing the difference in our physical strength. Almost a year later (according to her claim), I am hearing this so-called one year old (non-existing, additional) incidence for the first time in my life, which I never experience by myself, but she claims that I caused it.

Corruption: my ex and her use of state/academic budget

When I and kids settle down, my Ex should be deported from this country for the sake of humanity, country, state, and my and her kids. He is useless for kids and this country: He is vicious human-beating creature for long period; academically he produced nothing, has written no single paper publication but just waiting for others to write papers with his name on them (no wonder why his first greencard application was rejected; on the other hand, while being sleep-deprived with little kids with no single helper, i had written five papers), his teaching terrible (a major college severed its relationship with his department because of uselessness of teaching for its college students and is hiring its own science instructor).

He has spent most of his night time in the campus building to chat with two college assistant students (innitially he claimed) and the woman (and do something secret?) (while claiming to teach night classes even during the semester when he actually didn’t have night classes (like his 2nd semester) but claimed that he had night teaching). I bet it was only these two college student assistants who had been present in the building around these two creatures during nights. He’s been like this woman’s secretary, like buying lab equipments for her and office coffee maker from stores etc (quite worthy labor for his position? for that kind of woman?: Quite Respectful!) while this woman’s  husband babysitted their young daughters at home. I wish he had been bigger person than this, instead of doing these choires, actually doing some research? Is he/she worthy for their salary?

Finally, the wrongful use of students’ tuition and state money for fun activity between this woman and my husband in the dept whose number of students counted from three to less than ten in last a few years? Despite in the midst of recession and state and academic budget cuts, this woman seemed to decide to use some money from the leftover dept budget, in order to get out of their dark night building closet and hang around with each other (despite her hubby) and kids in kids’ entertainment park in ks city under daylight. So, she (in the name of her hubby’s name) created the end of semester party among dept collegues at kids’ entertainment theme park. Of course, nobody joined because their kids are either grown ups and/or it was in the middle of recession. So, she (manipulating her ignorant hubby?) changed the plan as college students’ science project, claiming students of the dept to measure something of the wheel of giant ride in theme park. So, she, my ex, her and my kids, her current legal hubby, and bunch of college students had funday of entertainment park at the end of last spring semester, with the money that college students borrowed from banks, loans, by working during daytime and going school during nights. Many of them from poor faming ks towns. If she and my ex used personal money for that outing, probably no problem. But using state / academic budget for their personal funday should be something else. Isn’t this corruption? Why state, school, students should waste budget/resources to assist  their affair?

Now, despite my ex’s early excitement of Anetha Franklyn’s huge weight loss news (meaning his this girlfriend or illegal wife also decided to lose weigh from her grizely mama bear figure and telling him so a few month ago.), this woman seems to be heading toward more obese body figure (i thought he is for analexic teen girls, but seemed to change his taste (his mother is also very heavy woman by the way), increased gray-hairs-wrinkles stage with her kids going unruly (my ex will go throught his crazy / screaming era of half decade all over again in future, if they get together eventually (he must be very excited about that prospect), as he had done with my two kids when they were younger, especially to older one when she was b/2-6 yrs old).

I’m not sure whether this woman’s increasing obesity is her own strategic movement of either (A) making herself looking more horrible so that nobody would imagine, perceive her as a female who could be able to engage in any kind of physical affair?; or (b) she has been so worried about the possibility of Ex getting a criminal charge and being deported from this country? I wouldn’t be quite sure. The whole world is mytery to me.